Sometimes is difficult to stop all this cyclical mind-talk, but language can help.
When I committed to the #100daychallenge, I knew my main difficulty: the mental fatigue that would accompany me at the end of the day, and altogether boycott my concentration and ability to paint/draw.
At the same time, I wanted this challenge to be the dividing line between these two worlds. I didn't want to be physically at home and mentally at my workplace.
Sometimes our heads become boisterous places, and that's not always a good thing. It becomes difficult to stop all this talking in our heads, and we get stuck in cyclical, limiting thinking.
And although this was the first step, it wasn't enough. That's why I started looking for other additional techniques.
There are multiple proposals, but this kind of unhealthy mental noise is one of the themes of the new book "Chatter" by #EthanKross, an experimental psychologist and neuroscientist at the University of Michigan.
For Ethan, this chatter "can make it really hard for us to think and perform well. And one principal reason for that is you only have so much ability to focus at any given moment in time. And so, if all your focus is devoted toward your chatter, good luck getting anything done."
And he keeps explaining about other consequences: "It can also have social consequences. When we experience #chatter, it can often lead to enhanced friction in our relationships. And it could do so in a variety of ways. We go to other people and talk about our problems, and we keep talking about them and keep #talking, which pushes other people away. Or, when we're experiencing heightened negative emotions, we often can lash out at other people. We displace our feelings on them. What chatter does is take a stressful experience and prolong it. Stress in and of itself isn't bad. What makes #anxiety worse is when it's prolonged over time, and that's what chatter does."
In this book, Ethan Kross walks through the reasons why our heads are so noisy, what happens in our brains when we #ruminate, and presents some techniques for regaining control of our inner voice. Sounds easy, doesn't it?
Reflecting on your problems and coming up with solutions is one of the best ways to move forward in life (even if it's not the most pleasant way to spend time).
This kind of repetitive "conversation" happens, Kross explains, when we get stuck in a mental rut, recapitulating the same worries over and over without coming to any practical conclusions.
Breaking out of this rut requires putting some #emotionaldistance between you and whatever is bothering you. It's hard to figure out how to solve a problem when you're super upset about it.
Talk to yourself as if you were another person
"Language can help", says Kross: "All you have to do is stop your #innervoice from saying "I" and use some other word or pronoun." Research shows that a simple "distance self-talk technique allows people to change their perspective and see problems more objectively.
The best medicine for being stuck on a problem is to #gainperspective on it. And a way to achieve that perspective is to talk to yourself as if you were another person. Example "You can never be certain why he..., Lara. He might well be..."
"The exact language you choose doesn't seem to matter much. Replace the first person with your name, use 'you'/'he'/'she,'" explains Kross. As long as you're encouraging yourself to think about your issues like an outsider, avoiding the "me, myself and I." This way, you will more easily find an outlet for disturbing thoughts while moderating your emotional burden attached to them.
"Different #strategies work for other people in different situations. And it's really about combining techniques. When experiencing chatter, several things can be done:
Distanced self-talk.
Temporal distancing.
Have some advisors that help give some perspective. (Not necessarily with people close to, but people who are adept at helping.)
Take walks in nature and
Tidy up the space around.
"The human mind didn’t evolve to always be in the moment. The challenge is to figure out how to travel in time in our minds more effectively without getting stuck." - Ethan Kross
Spending more time outdoors.
#Nature "gives our mind the ability to recharge... by subtly calling our attention to simple things like the colors of a flower, the song of a bird, the shapes of a puddle of water or cloud, etc.
The next time you find yourself stuck in an unproductive mental loop, go to the nearest green space, a park, your backyard, porch, or simply the pot of aromatics over the sink and start by taking care of it.
Do you have dry leaves to remove? How is the humidity? Smells good? And only after, spend a few minutes thinking how you could help a good friend that by coincidence has your name and the same struggles as you.
"The challenge is to figure out how to travel in time in our minds more effectively without getting stuck, rather than trying to shut down the time travel machine altogether when we're upset."
With luck, you'll be back with a much #clearermind.
How about you, what other strategies do you consider useful to stop the #mentalloop?
Share with us your experiences.
This post is based on Ethan Kross's interview for Nautilus.
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